Blue Blood

"My, but this is a howler.... Oliver Reed is the singularly nasty "Tom", butler to the suitably wimpish "Lord Gregory" (Derek Jacobi). In addition, I hope to stop us all dying from boredom, "Tom" is also the grand wizard (?) of a Satanic cult that practices it's devilish antics in the stately pile of his unwitting host (aptly filmed at Longleat House - home of the late Marquess of Bath - he of the "wifelets"). Anyway, what ensues is a sort of dirty "Downton Abbey". Just about everyone sleeps with the other; the cluttered plot is preposterous and both Reed (I hope) and Jacobi (I trust) had their tongues firmly in their cheeks as this nonsense trundles on for what seemed like an interminable 90 minutes. Some lovely Paisley pattern clothing - if that's your thing, but I'm afraid this is amongst the worst British films that I have ever sat through."